Once a friend told me, "o godz--the building across the street just grew a proboscis."
It was construction season in Boston.
Two mathematicians, Joe and Bob, are in a restaurant. Joe is talking about how he feels that math education has really improved in his lifetime.
Bob is a grumpy old man. He disagrees. Strongly.
Joe says, "You know, I bet the average person on the street even knows a little calculus." Bob laughs.
Bob goes to the bathroom. While he's gone, Joe calls their waitress over and tells her: "Listen, I'm going to ask you to come over here in about five minutes. When you do, I'll ask you a question. I want you to answer "One-third x cubed." If you do, I'll leave an extra $5 in the tip."
The waitress blinks at him. "One thir-dex cue?"
"Sure, close enough."
Bob comes back from the bathroom and Joe says, "Look, I'll bet our waitress knows the integral of x squared."
Bob scoffs. Joe bets him $10.
They call the waitress over and Joe asks her the integral of x squared. As instructed, she answers "One third x cubed".
And as she's walking away, she calls back over her shoulder, "plus a constant."