Monday, February 24, 2014

I Have Nightmares

My nightmares typically reveal my fears of insecurity, especially about failures, what people think of me, the fear of being the last person on Earth as a pulsating sun speaks to me, going to the supermarket and collecting everything I want to realize I have no money. Then when I was younger it was the fear of public nudity that suddenly occurred in the hallways of my school.

Now, to live a nightmare. I've lost friends, I've been in the "hole", I learned to drink tap water again after years of filtered snobbery. I will share this so called nightmare... My laundry was all dirty so I looked in the closet to find a pair of black corduroy pants to wear to work. Work was a clean room, where I processed microprocessor chips in a "bunny suit" (a fully encased body suit). The button came off my pants so I grabbed a safety pin to attached my pants and rushed to work.

Two hours or so I was ready for a break, I left the line to go to breakfast and stored my bunny suit outside the clean room. I left the doors and felt a draft on my buttocks. I reached back to discover that my pants had deteriorated and my rear end was completely exposed. As I paused in disbelief, a woman chuckled behind me. I rounded the corner and wrapped my outer shirt around my waist. One other detail, I was not wearing underwear. I figured I could survive the shift, have a couple meals and after all I would be in a suit most of the day.

My next break revealed that the front of my pants existed only of a zipper strip and I found myself subjected to hobbling like the Hunchback of Notre Dame to the bathroom. I called my girlfriend and asked her to bring me pants. It was the longest walk out of the building and to the parking lot toward the car. Many rough, brown paper towels crumbling around my lower regions just as my pants did. I had a sudden fear that I could be arrested for public indecency.

I made it to the car and changed my pants, the problem resolved and relief delivered. I lived through a nightmare and immediately had a great laugh about it. Even better, I can't imagine how many billions of microchips were ultimately destroyed by a disintegrating pair of corduroy pants that were coupled up to a nude body. There's my story with one last of that redundant listserve repetitive wisdom that tires me.... Running away is so much more scary than facing whatever it is you fear.

Try to do the smallest thing you can to let someone know they exist, bye.

Jeremiah Rudnicki
Vermont, USA

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