It was there (that I saw you)

We met at the roof-top party overlooking our beautiful city. It was electric. We danced. We smoked. It felt like we’d known each other forever. His wife was jealous, she didn’t like me. I was young and naïve she said. I was just making a scene she said. My bozo fiancé didn’t care, he didn’t even notice. He just drank whisky and had a good time. They left. I didn’t see him for a long time after that.

Bozo and I invited him to come party with us one night. I was drunk. Bozo was somewhere else. I made my intentions clear to him that night – I grinded on him and he stood there and grinned.

He wanted more, but I got cold feet. He’s married! I’m about to be married! Heck, I was even at his wedding! No, we can’t. Bozo later tells me that things were getting ugly between him and his wife. They drifted apart, and he drifted into psychosis. A mania fuelled by his music.

It was frantic. It was crazy. It hurt. He sang of unrequited love and of being as dirty as sin. He recorded a demo, and sought feedback from Bozo. So he came to our party. We drank. We flirted. We moved the party into our beautiful city so we could dance the night away.

My bozo fiancé drank too much. Suddenly he’s gone home. No goodbye. No explanation. It’s just me and his friends. Perfect!

We conspired. We schemed. We wanted to dance, so we left his boring friends. We never looked back. It was just him and me. The man with the wife, and the girl with the fiancé.

We walked up the steps. BANG! It was a mass of sweaty gyrating people. Yes! We danced to Bowie. We smoked clove cigarettes. We choke-danced to Death in Vegas. We drank Jägermeister. The energy between us was like stars exploding. We smoked some more. He leaned in. I leaned in. And we kissed, as though nothing could fall.

Last drinks were called and we hit the streets. We walked and came to the park that overlooked the bridge. It was beautiful. We kissed. We fell deep and strong for each other.

It’s six in the morning. No key to get into Bozo’s house. He’d be too drunk to answer my call. Fuck it, it’s cold, can I crash at yours?!

The cab ride was over as quickly as it had begun. Driving away from Bozo was surreal. We’re in his house now. Pictures of wife on the mantle. We sit down. He takes a tablet, I take off my belt and kick off my boots.

He looks at me with those green eyes. And we kiss. And we fuck. Though, something’s wrong - he’s asleep! A sleeping tablet?! That was enough to wake me up! What have I done! I just cheated on Bozo. I leave him sleeping on the couch. I sleep in their marital bed.

I wake. I feel sick. What did I just do?! I told myself I would never be that type of girl again. He comes into their room. He slides into their bed and kisses my forehead. He tells me it’s going to be ok. And I believed him.

And it has been. After such a wild courtship I never knew love could be like this. All encompassing. Never feeling alone. Home is wherever he is.

It has been ten crazy years filled with music, fun, food, and now a beautiful little baby girl. I love you BKMB, always and forever.


Nancy Nobody
mercydoll[AT]gmail.com
Canberra, Australia

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